"Engage brain before you engage your mouth!"
He would generally say
this with some well-meaning but ill-placed hope, shortly before cuffing
me around the head when I next said something useless. I was always
being accused of living in 'My Little Pony Land', candyfloss dreams
where the mouth used to happily canter away long before the grey matter
caught up. Generally my family would assume I was foolish; thoughtless,
chatterbox, nonsensical berk. I prefer to use the term 'quick-witted'.
I think I have got the better of my brain. I see when it is forming a
mischievous plan to make me look ridiculous, often by mispronouncing a
word that I have no trouble spelling ('chauffeur' becomes 'shaffer';
'VANtage' becomes 'van-TAAARGE') and so my lips clamp together in a
cracked, nervous grin on a regular basis.
however, have not yet developed control. It is these people this blog
primarily sets out to find. The people whose mouths rule their brain, not the
other way around. Without them, this site is nothing. People Who Say
Things They Shouldn't (And Then Realise They Sound A Bit Daft), this is
for you. I love all of you, though I do occasionally get the urge to hit
you over the head with something, because you drive me insane.
I will also be posting joyful internet pictures that make me giggle, splendid photographs and maybe waffle on about stuff I like. I hope